How To Qualify

How To Qualify

 Borrowed from mystery
Try to approach this from a very natural perspective. Ask yourself – what do you want in a woman besides looks? Does this woman meet your standards as a human being? In Magic Bullets, Savoy says, “Figure out what you really want in a woman, and then take this a step further by asking yourself how a woman who possessed those characteristics would present herself. Now, spend your Qualification phase looking for precisely that. For example, among other things, I value intelligence and education. I screen for this in qualification, by asking her about books she has read and movies she has seen.” This is spot on.

I personally ask the following questions in qualification:

• ‘Cool people are a dying breed. What do you do for fun?’
• ‘I get the feeling that you’re job doesn’t completely fulfil you creatively. Do you have a passion outside of work?’
• ‘My ex used to say that there are two types of people in this world – boring and crazy. What’s the most adventurous thing you’ve done lately?’ (NB this is sometimes followed by – ‘where’s the craziest place you’ve had sex?’)
• ‘So what do you want to be when you grow up?’
• ‘What would you say are your 3 best qualities?’

Importantly, do not just IOI directly after the response that they give. I always inquire deeper into the interest/topic/issue. Only when they say something unique, should you actually give an IOI (or reward and relate) – see below for more on this.

Common Mistakes

• Don’t simply give IOI’s for anything she says while qualifying. Try and inquire a little bit deeper and get some unique information out. Qualification is a form of connecting to the girl on a more emotional level. For example, is you say, “Are you adventurous?” and she says “Yes”, don’t just stop there! Ask her “So what’s the most adventurous thing you’ve done lately?” When she describes it to you, only then reward and relate. The point is to make her work a little bit for your approval.
• Qualification can get boring if you’re not being inquiring. The crux point is this: the attraction phase is based more on wide repore (i.e. multiple conversational threads, changing topics and transitioning incessantly). The qualification phase is based more on deep repore (i.e. emotional connection, asking questions, reward and relating).
• Don’t forget to sexually escalate during, and after, qualification. What I mean by sexual escalation is moving towards the kiss close and/or establishing sexual interest and/or establishing that you are a sexual threat. It’s fine to escalate during the qualification (in fact you should be doing this) but once you have actually qualified her, you definitely should escalate further. I might make a completely separate post of proper escalation if there is enough interest but for now, you can sexually escalate by any combination of the following: keeping strong eye contact (‘bedroom’ eyes), triangular gazing, lowering your tonality, allow conversation to gravitate towards sexual topics and keeping prolonged or more intimate kino (e.g. touch/hold her hands or touch back of neck if she is talking into her ear).