Change..

Hello, my name is Rubix. I can’t tell you my real name in fear of my identity being figured out by those in field; sorry. Sense this is my first post I guess introductions are in order *warning depressing shit ahead* . I’ve been into the game for a little bit now.. really only half assing it.. using it mostly to hook up with ex’s just for validations sake. Oh and I am only 18 and 2 months, SHOCKER! Anyways now that we have that out of the way we can get back to the story .

So I’ve come to a point in my life where I look around me and I have realized that I need to change or I’m gonna be as fucked up as those around me, or worse. To give an example here are the backdrops of the people I’m friends/were friends with:

—-Names have been ****ed out for privacy—-

Me-Stoner, barely passing school, drugy, faker

*****-Stoner, Alcoholic, Whore, Drugy

*****-Has a kid, Lives at home with her single and poor mom, B/F is in jail, only 17

*****-Died in an alcoholic car crash (his fault)

*****- Gang banger now, Gang’s sex whore, Drugy

*****-Fat pathetic loser, Stoner

*****-messed up in the head, Stoner, Drugy, Whore *she is super hot though*

*****-Still really nice and doing good in school and life but is friends with above.. also she is a stoner

*****-lucky girl moved

*****-Multiple suicide attempts, Cutter, Stoner, Drugy, Alcoholic, Married by 18

*****-Just a stupid annoying whore

“Cool Gangster Friends”-All dropped out and haven’t seen or heard them sense

*****-ODed in school, dropped out, cutter, poet, suicidal

*****-Alcoholic, Drugy, Stoner, Cutter, attempted suicide, drunk abusive dad, dad raped her, she moved

*****-Funny midget (really!), stoner

*****-She was balemic(sp?) in middle school and a cutter but I managed to help her out.. until the school districts changed for some reason and split our school in 2 categories; those who stayed, and those who left.. she left and was balemic again,then stoner, alcoholic, and super shallow

*****-Stoner,Drugy, and last time anyone heard from him he was hiding somewhere in texas from some mexican gangs he riped off up here

*****-used to be real smart and sweet but now she is emo,sluty,and an alchy

*****-was actually my very first real relationship.. lasted 3 months in elementry school and didn’t even kiss her… I hear she’s a lesbian now

*****-Not sure whats up with her…

*****-used to be cool but now he’s a drugy loser but he sure does get laid though

*****-fat pathetic fucker who sells coke now… but he has always been a fat pathetic fucker

***** and *****- put these 2 together because they are religious nuts and are total nerds who never get laid, also sad fuckers

*****(Buddha)-is an old football buddy from waaay back, he is actually doing pretty good besides being fat (he needs to be for the offensive line), he’s got a LTR going  and his life is overall pretty good, good for you man

                                                                                                                                                                    

Ok, see that was just so you get the point of where I am coming from. Now it may not seem so but I actually live in a pretty nice neighborhood, full of beautiful women and opportunity, I guess I was just with the wrong crowd. Everyone around me is either dead, dieing, or slowly rotting away like a crab being sooo sllloowlly boiled he doesn’t even notice. My goal is to step up my game and have some crazy fun adventure and also to improve my life-style 10 fold.

 Now I’ve always seen the huge role of “self development” in the game and I believe it will really help me make it out of here. So I guess now is the time for change, now is the time to really start my adventure and really start improving my life. Wish me luck.